Oof! Darlington, or Mordor, as I used to call it, was measurably worse than Newcastle for this! I lived in Ferryhill for a couple of years, so I’m familiar with that area. Definitely low on the list of places I’d recommend moving to in the UK!

Having met one or two people from New Zealand, you guys strike me as a tough and hardy bunch. If anyone could survive there, yous would have a good shot!